He Perfects Us, Not Our Circumstances

Over a decade ago, before I made the decision to become a follower of Christ, I was preparing to become a Buddhist. After tremendous deliberation, I had decided that Buddhism offered the solution to filling a deep void in my heart left when I realized the god of my youth was a sham.

Like many who are culture-struck it is innate within us to seek out something—someone to help us transcend beyond our problems. The crux of the Buddhist faith is Transcendence beyond our trials. A true Buddhist will innocently challenge a Christian with the question, "Why would you follow a God who requires that you suffer for him?" Our answer does not make sense. It is because we love Him that we choose to persevere through trials.

We do not serve a God who does not talk back. We serve a God who loves us and wants to know us. We serve a very real God who loves us deeply and wants to be our strength when circumstances around us are grim. He does not want us to rise above the storm; He wants us, in faith, to persevere through it.

A pregnant mother, no matter how holy will carry a baby to term. An athlete, no matter his status in the kingdom will be required to train before receiving a medal. Our God celebrates growth. He requires it. He does not want mindless, spoiled children who crumble at the threat of thunder. He wants us to persevere and embrace Him as the great Deliverer.

The good news is that He did not leave us without instruction.

 ⁷ Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
   for with the LORD is unfailing love
   and with him is full redemption.
⁸ He himself will redeem Israel
   from all their sins. 

    — Psalm 130:7-8 

For most of us, the holidays are characteristically wrought with opportunities to abandon our plans of self-rescue and wait for God to move. Our Creator continues to be the only one who can truly rescue us from the cruel masters of sin and death. The verses above emphasize His power and willingness to save. He is, in fact, better at saving us than we are at sinning.

Christ saves us from the penalty and the power of sin. But he doesn't stop there. He delights in making all things new, empowering us to mend fences with others, bring joy where there is despair and make all that we do bring Him great glory. Though Jesus does not perfect our circumstances in this world, we should be able to see Him working to bring renewal to all areas of our lives.

The great servant does a great work for us, we who can not save ourselves.


 Think About It

1. The holiday season will bring trials. Are you prepared to face the storm with Him as your shield? Will you allow him to fortify strong relationships and repair broken ones? Make a list of those relationships you expect God to move upon and then show it to your spouse. Pray with each other and discuss. 

 2. Are you in a storm right now? Some storms God will cause to blow around you, while others He will require that you persevere through. Sometimes it is difficult to know which your storm is. Know that ultimately He wants to see Himself glorified in us. You don't have to go into the holiday season half-cocked and blind. Fight Club is here for you. Call someone. Ask for them to pray. Know that where there are two or more who agree, He is there.

 3. Who can you share the answers to these questions with? Will they walk with you through your freedom journey? Commit to six months of transparency, teachability and accountability with another husband or wife (same gender as yourself). 

Scripture for a Marriage

• Psalm 91:11

• Luke 7:36-50

Fight Bite: The Fight is Not Ours

Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but... against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.  -Ephesians 6:12

For he shall give his angels charge over you  -Psalms 91:11

 

 If our battle is not with each other, then who is our battle with?  Who fights for us?

Kick @$$: What Andrew Said

How could one man chase a thousand, or two put ten thousand to flight, unless their Rock had sold them, unless the LORD had given them up?   -Deuteronomy 32:30

God's protection of His people was so certain that their conquest by enemies could occur only if it were He who gave them over. This is what Andrew said:

1 = can put 1 thousand to flight
1+1 = can put 10,000 to flight

Team mutiplies the abilities of the participants. In team the sum of the whole is much greater than the sum of the individual parts. There is a synergistic effect in unity.


Got any stories of this synergistic phenomenon? Bring 'em Thursday... 

Think About It

1. Are you working together allowing each other's strengths to play out, or are you still fighting against the grain demanding your way is the only way? 

2. Have you been guilty of robbing your family of this synergy? What can you repent for right now – with genuine and honest repentance – to your spouse? Now, do it. Right now.

3. Who can you share the answers to these questions with? Will they walk with you through your freedom journey? Commit to six months of transparency, teachability and accountability with another husband or wife (same gender as yourself). 


Scripture for a Marriage

• Deuteronomy 7:24

• Deuteronomy 6:10

I Am Thankful for Freedom

...where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. - 2 Corinthians 3:17

In 1916 Oswald Chambers, a great man of God, was asked at the close of his service in World War I what he would do next. War equals uncertainty. Chamber's ministry helped soldiers deal with the uncertainty of war they faced day in and day out. Chambers made a statement when questioned about what he might do after the war.  His answer? “Trust God and do the next thing.” 

What a profound statement that deserves meditation. To trust Him to the extent that there is no worry. No anxiety. No anticipation for what may or may not be. What a state of being where uncertainty loses its power! There is a deep freedom in that statement that transcends mere appreciation or comfort. If we can live there, it will take us to a state of relationship where true self-abandonment is possible.

It is this freedom from the trappings of fear that allow us to be great in our marriages. In our work. In our service. From one divine assignment to the next we are utterly His.

Think About It
1. Ask God to show you your heart and ask Him to reveal those places that are not His. If you are a Christian, you are as free as you will ever be, but are you living free?

2. When have you allowed anxiety, worry or insecurity to rob you of the freedom in your marriage? How does that lack of freedom effect your family? Your spouse? You? What can you repent for right now – with genuine and honest repentance – to your spouse? Now, do it. Right now.

3. Who can you share the answers to these questions with? Will they walk with you through your freedom journey? Commit to six months of transparency, teachability and accountability with another husband or wife (same gender as yourself).

Scripture For Your Fight
2 Corinthians 3:17

What Jason Said

Whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. - 1 Corinthians 10:31

Jason is a new friend. I've known him for a few years now, but I feel like I am just now really getting to know him. He's exact. He's thoughtful. Sometimes quiet. Sometimes not. He's put together, and thinks before he talks. Often he's the kind of guy you don't want to sit by to make sure no one compares you to him. I don't think he gives off this vibe on purpose—I think it's the opposite. I think he really does try hard to not make others feel uncomfortable around him. He's intelligent... super intelligent... but you'd never know it unless he slipped up and you caught a glimpse like I did.

Recently, we were both outside of a bunkhouse at a men's retreat chatting with a few guys. Through the course of the conversation, one of the men we were talking to learned Jason was a non-practicing lawyer and asked him why he wasn't. At that moment the kiddie-ride conversation was over. Jason began to talk about his own personal proclivities toward the legal industry. It was quite an impressive, well thought out answer. After a few minutes it was clear I was the only one in the group that had no clue what they heck they were talking about. I then just kind of zoned out like I do around people speaking a language I don't. I just listened for my name and nodded a few times like I understood hoping no one would ask me a real question.

I wrote all that because I wanted to tell you what Jason said the other day. It's important, I think, to know the weight of someone's words, and (in this case) the weight of what he said. Some people (like me) can say a whole bunch sometimes and not really say much at all. Then, there are others that seem to stay ponderously quiet stewing on golden nuggets of truth while strategically waiting to release them at the right moment. Jason is that kind of guy.

We got a treat last Fight Club. Jason and his equally amazing wife, Reese led it. There was great banter, group facilitation and times of deep thought. It was really the kind of group we want. Lots of talk interjected with little golden nuggets of interesting. Jason at one point was talking about purpose and something he said stuck with me—I haven't been able to get it out of my mind since. He said this (and, I'm paraphrasing)...

If as single Christians it is our purpose to know God and to be a [witnessing force] to those that don't know Him, wouldn't it make sense that we are called, ultimately, to be that same [powerhouse] as a married couple?

The moment he said this I was stopped in my tracks. Really at that moment nothing else mattered, and I heard nothing else that was said. I was mentally chewing. I knew he had made a deeply profound statement and it showed with its impact. To know God—to allow Him to make us like Him—Godlike—isn't that our ultimate purpose as Christians? And, how often, lost in our own day-to-day workings do we forget that? How easy is it to let it slip our consciousness that our ultimate goal as a united force is to Glorify Him. Not ourselves.



Think About It

1. Do we glorify God in our marriage by living for Him, or are we glorifying ourselves by living for what we want? 

2. When have you put your needs before your spouses? Your children? What can you repent for right now – with genuine and honest repentance – to your spouse? Now, do it. Right now.

3. Who can you share the answers to these questions with? Will they walk with you through your freedom journey? Commit to six months of transparency, teachability and accountability with another husband or wife (same gender as yourself). 



Scripture for a Marriage

• 1 Corinthians 10:31
• Ephesians 5:26

Welcome to Fighting Words, The MFC Blog

There are two kinds of fighting in a marriage. Fighting each other while jockeying for position... or, the un-fight—where we step back and let God fight for us.

Sounds easy? It's not. The Israelites had a tough time of it even after all God did for them.

Led by Moses, God's chosen people fled the tyrannical Egyptians who had enslaved them for centuries. Once the Israelites were out of sight, the enraged Egyptians vowed to destroy them and climactic chase scene ensued.

You'd think they'd be more ready to be free. They weren't. They argued among their ranks and often displayed a lack of gratefulness. Even though they were free, they hadn't yet learned to be free. What's freedom to someone who's known nothing but captivity?

In Exodus 14:12, the people chided Moses to leave them alone. Their flight for freedom was proving disastrous with Pharaoh and their lack of faith was exposed. Despite the people's harsh words, Moses did not lash out against the complaining people. Instead he encouraged them with a promise that they would see the salvation of the Lord.

13 Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. 14 The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

So, what does that mean to us? If you're preparing the vows for your wedding, you'll no doubt consider 1 Corinthians 13. It's no wonder. The chapter is one of the most profound poetic compositions:

1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal...

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres

8 Love never fails...

So is this our challenge? We're called to live it out. It's not there for the heck of it. Not keeping a record of wrongs? Not quick to anger? Patience? Kindness? Not seeking anything for ourselves? We naively place it at the beginning of marriage in our vows because there is poetry there that stirs our heart. But 1 Corinthians 13 isn't meant to just stir our hearts, it is meant to be a part of us. To challenge us. To tear us up so we can be put back together the right way by Him. It is meant to change us. To live the type of love 1 Corinthians describes is a tough chore in our own strength and cannot be achieved through our own measly humanity. It requires a miracle to live out.

Do we concern ourselves with our own righteousness and let God worry about our spouse's? If we're unfairly judged or attacked, like Moses, do we refuse to lash out against the offender? How? How do we get to that place where we can say, "Okay, God I am tired of doing it my way" and let Him fight for us? Expect Him to move on our behalf. Convict. Teach. Encourage. Correct. Parent. How can we be that yielding? That sounds impossible!

That sounds like faith.

Think About It

1. What was your captivity? Perhaps you were abused or neglected as a child; or maybe you just have a really bad addiction to prime time. Maybe you have a deep selfish streak, or possibly you're still fighting doing it all your way. All of us have some type of captivity we were rescued from. If that were not true, what would we need a Savior for? Take some time this week and ask God to show you the places in your heart that cause you to still live as a slave. Ask him to reveal to you the areas that are holding you back from being the blessing He has called you to be for your spouse.

2. Have you ever lashed out at your spouse because you were just fed up? What result did it get you? Is that the character of marriage you want for your spouse? For you? For your children? Do you think that is God's best for your family? What can you repent for right now – with genuine and honest repentance – to your spouse? Now, do it.

3. Who can you share the answers to these questions with? Will they walk with you through your freedom journey? Commit to six months of transparency, teachability and accountability with another husband or wife (same gender as yourself).



Scripture for Your Marriage

• 1 Corinthians 13
• Exodus 14:12-14